i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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