can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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