I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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