Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize