Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(304): View more from West Virginia

My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina

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(845): View more from New York

Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping

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(662): View more from Mississippi

Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester

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(406): View more from Montana

I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote

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(210): View more from Texas

Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.

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(408): View more from California

You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt

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(720): View more from Colorado

Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience

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(213): View more from California

Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub

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