he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize