i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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