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• (289): View more from Ontario

  i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy

  (1-843): View more from South Carolina

  i am grossed the fuck out

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (631): View more from New York

  i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.

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• (310): View more from California

  I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.

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