I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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