Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
