Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
It's rum buckets o'clock
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
