can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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