Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry vixen922 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(201): View more from New Jersey

you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin

(914): View more from New York

and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston

Fav 3 2473 934
share tweet
(978): View more from Massachusetts

it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny

Fav 17 978 2791
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(305): View more from Florida

I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.

Fav 28 2011 3729
share tweet
(352): View more from Florida

my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.

Fav 17 1315 5269
share tweet
(786): View more from Florida

She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick

(305): View more from Florida

I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.

Fav 18 4236 1912
share tweet
(519): View more from Ontario

It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.

Fav 12 1730 2409
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(913): View more from Kansas

Naked Twister starts at high noon

Fav 16 2437 937
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+33): View more from France

I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.

Fav 0 108 5
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(609): View more from New Jersey

he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.

Fav 1 77 24
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT