I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize