i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Dicks are not precious.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
