I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
