is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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