Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
