Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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