i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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