Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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