i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
