How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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