is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
