Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize