Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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