How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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