So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
