i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
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