What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
