We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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