Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
