I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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