She's JV to your varsity
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
