Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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