Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
