i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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