This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize