You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Randomize
