Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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