I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Randomize
