You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
