my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize
