I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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