..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Randomize
