there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
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