Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
