I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize