Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
