the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
